Queen + Adam Lambert: In Concert!

I wrote on my personal Facebook page a few weeks back that every four years in July, Brian May and I get together to celebrate his birthday. Obviously this post wasn't entirely true: alas Dr. May has no idea about the interesting timing of our two encounters but that doesn't change the fact that on July 19, 2014 (Dr. May's 67th birthday and nearly four years to the day from the time I had the amazing opportunity to meet him), I saw Brian May and Roger Taylor performing as Queen in concert!

Rumors of this current North American tour began to circulate ages ago. You may recall that as early as 2010, Foo Fighter and massive Queen fan, Taylor Hawkins started talking about a tour. Unfortunately that particular matchup didn't come to pass but the whispering continued. I caught wind of them early on and vowed right then and there that if they scheduled a date anywhere near me, I was going. I missed out in 2005 when I was on my "but it's not Queen without Freddie" high horse and then their 2008 tour didn't even include a visit to the States. Honestly, Brian and Roger could have announced that they were touring with a bunch of singing rattlesnakes and I'd have made it my business to be there. (Although blech - maybe not rattlesnakes!)

As it turns out Brian and Roger decided to connect with American Idol veteran Adam Lambert for a North American tour, which began earlier this summer. Reception to this news on the major Queen fan front was - to put it mildly - mixed. Many felt that touring with anyone besides Freddie (and, of course, reclusive bassist John Deacon) was blasphemy. Others felt that a tour was fine but just not with someone whom they considered the very embodiment of a "C-lebrity", a song from the Queen + Paul Rodgers album released a few years back. Then there was the contingency of which I was a part: generally younger fans who sadly had no opportunity to see Queen in their heyday and realize that with both Brian and Roger firmly into their 60s, the reality of a tour is rapidly decreasing by the day.

When they released the dates, I was ecstatic: Madison Square Garden in NYC, TD Garden in Boston, and - ohmygosh, in my very own backyard - Mohegan Sun Arena in Connecticut! I dug out my rarely used American Express card to qualify for presale tickets and tasked ever-humoring Husband to purchase three tickets to the show. Presale, unfortunately, did not go smoothly. Tickets had been released in groups of 2 so a request for 3 was downright impossible: the system kept saying "none available"! Eek! Finally Husband snagged 2 tickets for me and a fellow fanatic friend and set out to find a single ticket for himself. The whole process was ridiculously nerve-wracking and made worse by the fact that tons of VIP tickets were available for several hundred dollars a pop. If it had just been me and Husband I probably would have paid the premium to get floor seats but I wasn't sure how high my friend was willing to go so we stuck with the regular seats. Finally, Husband got a ticket for himself and all systems were a go.

Of course literally the next day they announced a second date in Connecticut to account for the unexpected demand: that show is next Friday and tickets are still available. Argggg!

We booked a babysitter and made reservations to eat at Bar Americain (Bobby Flay's restaurant) before the show. To say I was nervous on Saturday was a bit of an understatement! I knew for sure that this concert was a once in a lifetime experience and I hoped everything went off without a hitch. Thankfully, it did! Dinner was delicious and just the right amount of food. I even treated myself to a frosty beverage to hopefully take the edge off a bit! We explored the casinos a while and I found my favorites: penny slots! I'm just about the cheapest person in the world and the idea of plopping down money that I'm just going to lose in five seconds makes me ill. With penny slots, I played the same $20 all evening before I lost it!

When it was time to go to the arena, there was a huge crowd gathered. Security was kind of a mess: they had male officers frisking male attendees and female officers further up the line frisking the ladies and checking bags. Seems like it might have made more sense to split up men and women or at least have some sort of signage indicating that was the procedure. While we waited, I checked out the makeup of the crowd which was very interesting. There were lots of older folks, but not older in the sense that "Brian and Roger are in their 60s and still awesome older"; it was more like "I'm going to hit the buffet at the golf club before nap older". I also spotted a fair number of families: parents in their 40s-50s with teenage-ish kids. The older generation definitely had the biggest showing though.

My shirt, which I will rarely wear lest it get worn!

The admission line basically lead straight into the merchandise line, which was fine because I knew I wanted a shirt. I'd scoped them out online earlier in the week and had narrowed it down to a particular style. My friend liked another style better (and I actually did too), but it didn't have the concert dates on the back and I really wanted that feature on the shirt. Otherwise it's just a Queen shirt that I could have bought anywhere! I also wanted to snag a program for a friend in Canada who visited the Montreal show but the programs were sold out.

So we waited...and waited...and waited.

Oh my gosh we were in this line forever! The shirts were all numbered and displayed on the wall so all you had to say was, "Number 3, size Medium" and then pay, but people were taking forever! One lady in front of us would say, "Number 12, size XL", the lady would get the shirt and then the first lady would say, "Number 30, size XL." You seriously couldn't order all the styles at once?!?!! Another two ladies stood there for ten minutes holding shirts up to their backs to figure out sizing as if they had never purchased t-shirts before. And I can't even count the number of people who asked, "What's on the back of Number [whichever]?" If the back isn't displayed on the wall, it's blank, people! Geesh!

We made our way to the front and at that point had decided to combine our orders to save time. My friend dealt with the lady for literally 45 seconds and 30 of those seconds were the lady fetching our two shirts. Everyone is seriously lucky that the show didn't start in the meantime or else I think we would have totally freaked out!

View from our seats. There were two giant television
displays and then a Q in the center with a video screen.
Unfortunately, our view of the Q video was blocked by
a piece of sound equipment.

Afterwards we found our seats. I've been in this particular arena before, but I was pleasantly surprised at how small it seemed. Suddenly our seats in the middle of nowhere didn't seem to terribly far from the stage. And even better, there was a catwalk and second smaller stage well within our view!




At this point it was past 8pm and I was ready for the show to start! I was definitely a little nervous and was bouncing around in my seat trying to contain my excitement. We did use the time to take a selfie photograph since Husband wasn't sitting with us to be official photographer of the night! We also chatted up the folks next to us: the couple to our left claimed to be big fans, but didn't know it was Dr. May's birthday so we weren't sure what to make of that and then man to our right said his brother was a big fan but he didn't do much squealing so who knows! (Obviously I'm being silly with both those statements: I don't go around judging whether someone's Queen fandom is adequate...or do I?)

The show itself was, in a word, amazing. Completely and utterly amazing. The set list was perfect: a combination of tried and true classics (Another One Bites the Dust, Crazy Little Thing Called Love, and Killer Queen) and more obscure tracks that separated out the real from the casual fans (Seven Seas of Rhye, In the Lap of the Gods...Revisited, and Now I'm Here). And more importantly, the boys sounded great. Dr. May and his Red Special were in rare form and good ole Roger thundered through the songs like a drummer half his age! He did have some assistance in the form of his youngest son, Rufus, who has been performing with the band as a percussionist for the past few years. Rog definitely held his own though and it was only during one song (Tie Your Mother Down, which came very late in the set list) that he completely handed over the drumming reigns to Rufus.

I'd made a very conscious decision that I didn't want to see any video of Adam Lambert performing with the band prior to the concert. You have to understand that this meant restraining myself for ages as Adam has been performing in one-off shows with Brian and Roger for several years now. For me, I felt very strongly that I needed to make my own opinion about the collaboration and I hoped that someday I'd be able to form that opinion after watching them perform together live. That said, I thought Adam did a fine job. He very clearly understood and made it clear to the audience that he understood that the show wasn't about him. I read a review that questioned why the boys didn't throw Adam's fans a bone in the form of one of his solo songs, but I think the answer is obvious: this wasn't Queen AND Adam Lambert. This was Queen + Adam Lambert. Of all the merchandise for sale outside the arena, there was ONE Adam Lambert shirt. Out of nearly 30 different Queen variations, including several that featured Freddie Mercury. Yes, Adam Lambert's fans may have come to the show to hear him sing, but there was no question that he was there to sing Queen songs and rather proud and honored to be doing so.

Adam's certainly got a flamboyant personality, that's part of the reason why many felt he would be a good fit for a band once fronted by Freddie Mercury, one of the most outrageously flamboyant frontman ever.  He was cheeky and wore some wild costumes, but remained respectful of his stagemates the entire evening. At one point, Dr May asked the crowd how we liked the "new guy" and his bashfulness at our polite applause seemed rather genuine.

Speaking of bashfulness, however, I'd be lying if I didn't say that my favorite part of the show was the middle section where Adam took a lengthy break. It began with Adam announcing that it was Dr. May's birthday and we all sang "Happy Birthday" to him. I'm including Husband's videos because he had a slightly better position in the crowd and has a better camera on his phone (and if you listen closely to the second video below, you can hear him singing along!!) Oh my gosh I seriously could not love this man more! As we sang, he made his way down the catwalk to the smaller stage and I knew immediately that some wonderful things were about to happen!

I was not disappointed. The next song was one that I've always wanted to see performed live because of its sing-along component: Love of My Life. The history behind this song is that Queen embarked on a world tour in 1980-1981. When they arrived in South America, this song (though released several years prior on the Night at the Opera album) was a huge hit and audiences demanded that the band play it. They complied and the crowd would sing along, often drowning out Freddie himself. When the band returned to North America (to film their iconic Queen: Rock Montreal concert), they included it in the set list, not realizing it wasn't quite the hit up north. This led to a very sweet exchange between Freddie and Brian about one verse into the song where Freddie says, "they don't know it!" From that point on, however, the song became fan favorite all over the world and has been a staple in the band's set list for decades. Now, of course, Dr. May both sings and plays guitar on this song and the emotion in his voice is evident. He asked us to sing along and promised us a "treat" at the end if we performed well. I'm not ashamed to admit that I definitely shed a tear while singing along to this one and I was horrified to see how many people made a beeline to the restrooms during this song! I think we should have locked them out! How could you walk out on this beautiful moment?

Although it was rather predictable, the "treat" at the end was a video of Freddie singing the final portion of the song. Yup, the tears were definitely flowing at that point!

The mini-set ended with Roger joining Dr. May for another one of my favorites: '39! Oh how I love this song and I greatly enjoyed singing along to this one as well. It really is a perfect example of what a dork Dr. May is though: he went into this whole elaborate explanation about how the song is a folk song set in outer space and then said we were going on a mission into space. Oh my gosh - talk about adorkable! Then they headed back to the main stage where Roger sang his signature contribution: Days of Our Lives, another one that tugs on the heartstrings of those fans who remember and loved Freddie so much.

Overall, I was very pleased with the concert. I was thrilled when later (on the closer stage, no less) they played Under Pressure. I didn't recall that one being on the set lists and as you may recall it holds a special place in my heart for being the song that showcases what an amazing musician Roger is. He sang his part as strong as ever and I swear for a minute it sounded like David Bowie had shown up! I was a little sad that Rog didn't get to sing lead on Radio GaGa, but I greatly enjoyed his dueling drum solo with Rufus! That was definitely not on the set list!

The one song I really did wish they had played was It's Late, my absolute favorite Queen song. They only ever played it live a few times in the 1970s so I knew this one was a long shot but I think it would have been amazing to hear. Maybe next time, eh boys?

I don't regret for a minute going to the show and several times just closed my eyes and enjoyed the fact that I was in the same room with Dr. May and Roger Taylor listening to them play music. It was completely surreal. And, again, I shed another tear during the encore as they played We are the Champions and I realized that this was the last song I'd likely ever hear them play live. (Unless I go back for tonight's show, which I totally might skip town and do!) It was truly a magical evening with two of my favorite musicians!

**NOTE** I've linked to my previous posts for each song on the set list that I featured as a Queen Song of the Week. I highly recommend that you go back and listen to the original recordings and live versions of those songs as they really are masterpieces that showcase the talents of four of the most iconic and diverse musicians of the 20th century!

Tons of fun at Dutch Wonderland!

Every year since Toddler O was born he and I have made the 10 hour journey to my hometown to visit my parents and sister. Because the drive is so long I am constantly trying to figure out ways to break up the trip or, even better, find a driving companion. The first year, Toddler O was a wee babe and just slept and nursed alternately for the entire trip. We stopped in my parents' hometown, where some relatives still lived, and then my parents drove to the Virginia boarder to see us the final three hours.

The second summer was even more awesome. We drove to Philadelphia with Husband who was there for work. Then we drove three hours alone before again meeting my parents at the Virginia boarder. Then my whole family drove with us to New Jersey for a wedding where we met Husband who drove with us the final few hours the following day.

This year we specifically planned the trip at a time when Husband had to be in D.C. and North Carolina for work. We drove to the Virginia boarder to meet my parents, but then Husband drove from D.C. to my parents' house to spend a few days. Then we all drove home together.

It's nice having company on the road and completely awesome when I don't have to drive. Toddler O was a rough driving companion this year because he talks constantly and doesn't stop talking until you figure out what he's saying and acknowledge it.

This is a typical conversation with Toddler O right now:

Toddler O: "Horses! I see horses."

Me: Looking around for horses and seeing none.

Toddler O: "Do you see horses, mommy?"

Me: "Where?"

Toddler O: "In the barn. Horses in the barn: do you see it?"

Me: "Ah yes. I see them." (realizing that in his mind barn = horse)

Toddler O: "Good."

And so on with each and every thing he laid eyes on for the entire trip. Oi!

Husband initially suggested breaking up the trip home by stopping at Sesame Place outside Philadelphia. I did a little research and decided that (1) it was ridiculously expensive: for the three of us to just walk in the gate it would have been $150+! and (2) it wasn't really something Toddler O would be into since it's mostly waterpark. I thought he might be a bit young. I poked around online a little more and came across Dutch Wonderland in Lancaster, Pennsylvania.

Randomly a girlfriend from high school lives in the Lancaster area so I emailed her to ask if she'd been to Dutch Wonderland and if her two year old liked it there. She emailed back right away that they love this particular park so that was enough for me. We decided right then and there to drive five hours to Lancaster, visit Dutch Wonderland and then drive the remaining five hours home the following day.

Dutch Wonderland was, in a word, adorable. I'd read online that it wasn't your typical amusement park: for example, there's a big ole cornfield at the edge of the park! And most of the rides are geared toward the 8 and under crowd. Perfect!

Outside the castle gates on Friday evening.

One comment that Husband made as we were driving down the main road toward Dutch Wonderland is that he understands now why Disney purchased every acre of land they could get their hands on outside of Disney World. It was very weird to be driving past restaurants, outlet malls, and Amish touristy stops and then *boom* amusement park. One of the first rides we went on was a little boat that basically rode along side the road for a bit!

Anyway, one of the super cool things about Dutch Wonderland is the cost. We paid about $70 for two daily tickets (you can get them for cheaper if you buy in advance on their website): Toddler O was free, but then they offer a "free preview evening!" So for the three hours before the park closes, you can use your daily admission ticket to get into the park and then use your admission ticket again for a full day of park fun! So basically you are buying a 1.5 day ticket, which is awesome!

We got to the park at 5pm on a Friday evening and it was pretty dead. Any ride Toddler O saw, we got right on. In fact, some rides he had to sit for 5 minutes in the airplane (or whatever) while other kids wandered over to get on. No line waiting at all!

As I said, the rides are all relatively tame, but there are still some minimal height and parental supervision requirements. Toddler O ended up being an "Emerald" which meant that he could go on most rides, but needed an adult with him on most. The ride workers all had these cute little color coded measuring sticks that they'd swing around to quickly categorize a kid. Another cool thing is that some rides actually had height maximums so Toddler O had to ride alone. He felt like a pretty cool dude on those rides!

Toddler O turned out to be a bit of a daredevil like Husband. His favorite two rides would have given me fits at age 3 (or even at age 33!). The first was called the Frog Hopper. This was had spots for six kids and then one adult could fit in the middle. The dad in front of us in line decided to go and I didn't want to risk Toddler O freaking out by having to wait any longer
so I just put him on by himself. He shrieked with delight the entire time and then wanted to go on again when we passed it later! I think it helped that there was an announcement that they kids should "ribbit" like frogs so he was screaming "ribbit" the whole time too! Very cute!

The other ride Toddler O loved I had spotted while we rode the Sky Ride across the park on the first evening: the Kite Flight. I knew I had no intention of going near it but I thought Husband and Toddler O might have fun. We visited it first thing the next morning and I was right: Toddler O screamed the whole time, "I'm flying!"

This year there is a whole new section at Dutch Wonderland called Exploration Island. It had animatronic dinosaurs and Toddler O's favorite, a sandbox. He was a bit nervous about the dinosaurs on the first night but the next day he specifically asked to see them again. He still didn't want to stand alone near them though which is how I ended up in this picture with his favorite dinosaur species: triceratops (which he calls "tops").

Dutch Wonderland also has a whole water park area called Duke's Lagoon but it was randomly 60 degrees the day we visited so it was a bit too chilly to try the water park. We did decide to be brave and went on the Double Splash Fume which got us more than enough wet for the day!

One thing that I wasn't crazy about at Dutch Wonderland is that there is a decidedly carnival feel once you get through the gates. In my mind, I paid my admission so once I'm in I should get to enjoy everything for free. Not so. They had pony rides for $6/ride (luckily I was more into Toddler O riding a pony than he actually was so we skipped it); face painting for $10 and up (!!!?!?), and lots of carnival games. As we passed one game, Toddler O saw a little girl choosing a rubber duck out of a pond. He started screaming: he wanted to choose a duck too. He didn't even care about the prize or know it was a game: he just wanted to pick up a stupid duck. $2 later he had chosen a duck and won this stupid little stuffed animal (it was one of those "everybody wins" games) that promptly went into my diaper bag and he hasn't mentioned since. Ugh - at least it was only $2!

As we left, I just had to hit up the gift shop. I'm such a sucker for gift shops, especially when Toddler O is at his current age of actually starting to remember things. I figure having a souvenir or two to jog his memory is a good thing. I found him a cute Duke the Dragon shirt, a magnet (which we always get when we visit someone), and this adorable Dutch Wonderland board game modeled after Candy Land. All told, I spent about $35 which I didn't think was too pricey.

We also splurged on one last treat before we went home: Dole Whips!

"What?" you might say, "I thought Dole Whips were only at Disney World!"

Apparently Disney World and Dutch Wonderland both appreciate the glory of a Dole Whip. Although I goofed again while ordering and got the orange swirl flavor instead of the pineapple swirl flavor (you may recall that while at Disney I first ordered the Dole Whip sans swirl which, while delicious, is not as glorious as the Dole Whip swirl). The orange flavor was still tasty though and Toddler O was just happy to have a big ole cone of ice cream. We've decided that from now on Dutch Wonderland will be a midpoint stop in our trip to Virginia so maybe by our 7th or 8th visit, I'll finally order the Dole Whip that I actually want to eat!

So if you ever find yourself passing through the Lancaster, Pennsylvania area and you have kids, definitely stop by Dutch Wonderland. It's a really sweet place and Toddler O is still talking about it!

Pinterest Inspired Father's Day Gifts

Okay, Husband, obviously by the title this post is about gifts for you so since I'm posting it before Father's Day, you need to curb any nosiness and stop reading right now!

I'll be the first to admit that I came ridiculously late to the Pinterest bandwagon. For years I did not understand what all the fuss was about. Then last October I started planning Toddler O's 2nd birthday party. I knew we wanted a Thomas & Friends theme so I started poking around on Google for party ideas. All of a sudden Pinterest made sense: instead of bookmarking a thousand different sites with one idea each or trying to remember which recipes I wanted to recreate, I could have it all in one place. I could even compare a few different ideas right next to each other and decide which one I liked better! I was a convert overnight and I created my first Pinterest board full of Thomas & Friends party ideas.

Since then I've created a few other boards too (although I still don't understand some boards that people create! I'm sure I'll eventually get it - I'm just a slow learner, I guess!). I have a bunch for recipes and a fashion board that I created for my Stitch Fix stylist. It occurred to me a few weeks ago though that I could create a board for Father's Day because there was no chance that Husband would be poking around on Pinterest and have all his gifts spoiled!

I knew what big gift I wanted to get Husband for a while now. Back when I was pregnant he got a bike for his birthday and he has literally been talking for the last 3.5 years about getting a trailer to take Toddler O out for a spin. We finally invested in a tricycle (and helmet) for Toddler O and Husband, of course, has his bike and helmet so all we needed was a trailer and he'd be good to go. I will admit that I had extreme reservation in purchasing the trailer for two reasons: (1) I'm not the greatest bicyclist and the idea of riding with such precious cargo makes me very nervous! and (2) Husband has accidentally lost 30 pounds the past year by inadvertently being on Weight Watchers (since I was doing the program and the cooking). There is definitely more than a little bit of me that will be enraged if he starts actually exercising again and loses more weight! Ugh men!

Several of my girlfriends have (and use) bike trailers though so I've been assured of their safety. I checked different brands and styles for a while but couldn't find one that fit my requirements of being not crazy expensive (i.e. a Baby Jogger pod which looks awesome but - holy guacamole - $450???) and fitting a child as big as Toddler O is (more than 3 feet tall and 33 pounds). I didn't want something that he'd grow out of by the end of this summer. Finally, I randomly got an email from Amazon that they had marked down some trailers. The first one on the list was a brand one of my girlfriend's had and liked (Schwinn) and carried up to 50 pounds! For $100! The reviews were all very good so I bit the bullet and snagged it. We're actually out of town for the next week without Husband so I told him he could open the package when it arrives a full week before Father's Day. I mean it's not like he can use it without us (unless he goes out and rents another toddler!) Now he'll have an extra reason to be excited about us coming home!

So the big gift was out of the way but Husband is meeting us out of town (we're at my mom's house) next week. I wanted to do something small to celebrate Father's Day here so enter Pinterest!

First, I made this beer caddy. Adorable, right? I sewed it all by myself (this is actually prototype 2.0 as the first one was too small to actually fit a beer bottle. Ooops - live and learn, right?) I followed this tutorial from Pinterest, which looks a lot more complicated than it actually is. The hardest part was finding all the specialty fabric at Joann's! And I had to make my own stencil since I never did find an iron-on stencil that wasn't glittery! After I made it, I made my brother-in-law model it for us, complete with a beer bottle. It looks so cute! I figure Husband can wear it for cookouts, golfing, even mowing the lawn! I have tons of fabric leftover so I made just start a side business making these silly things now that I'm such a pro!


Here's the back. I actually sewed a little belt loop that you can put around your belt! So cute! If you do decide to try it yourself, I went rogue and sewed the ripstop nylon liner first by pinning it around an actual beer bottle. Then when it came time to create the outer layer (of canvas and fusible fleece), I knew exactly how big it needed to be to still fit the bottle. Just a little tip so your first version doesn't end up in the garbage like mine did!


My second project was actually more complicated and time consuming than the beer caddy was! I had seen a cute print-out on etsy (via Pinterest) of a tree with hand prints in place of leaves. Very cute. Toddler O has never really been big into crafting but after 8 weeks of "school" where he "painted" every week, I thought maybe he'd be ready for it. The PDF from etsy was $10 and since I am ridiculously cheap, I refused to pay that and figured I could recreate the look on my own. Initially I had construction paper, a mat and a frame but then I realized that a canvas could actually be nicer (and cheaper!) so I bought that instead. I also invested in some tempera paint in six primary colors, figuring I could mix a wide variety of shades for the project. First, I got to work on my own while Toddler O was sleeping. I painted the tree trunk and ground line. Then I stenciled "Happy Father's Day 2014" in a purple ombre color scheme. The stenciling alone took forever because I had to wait for each individual letter to dry before I could do another one!

I was so nervous to turn the project over to Toddler O! Obviously he was going to be supervised, but it was up to him to not completely destroy my beautiful branches and stenciling! He was very excited to have paint on his hands and right away knew that he had to press his hand onto the canvas. It certainly didn't hurt that the previous day we had been to a craft program at the history museum which just so happened to involve making hand print cows! He did great for the first four hand prints. The fifth one got a little crazy: he changed the position of his hand at the last minute and then wiggled his fingers a bit. I consulted with my artist adviser (i.e. my sister) who recommended doing a sixth hand print to try to cover up some of the damage. That helped significantly and I had to remind myself a few times that he's only a boy of two and his art projects shouldn't be too perfect! I did manage to sneak in two extra hand prints for a second present for Pops (my dad)!

Finally, I spotted a super cute mason jar filled with Reese's Pieces. Husband is a big fan of peanut butter and always puts Reese's Pieces on his Sweet Frog creations so this seemed like an appropriate candy treat to give him. The mason jar is decorated with a tie, which he doesn't actually wear to work anymore but it was cute so I did it anyway. Because I had my new collection of tempera paints, I painted the tie rather than coloring it or creating it with construction paper. On the top I stenciled "love you to pieces" (ha!). 

So there you have it: even a big Pinterest newbie like me can find and actually replicate some pretty adorable ideas! Ultimately I changed the name of my board from "Husband" to "Gift Ideas" and now I'm going to use it year round to keep track of all sorts of cute possibilities for friends, teacher gifts and family. Husband has already received his trailer and seemed excited by it so I hope he's super surprised when he gets into town and has more gifts to open! It was fun making them, particularly the tree which got Toddler O involved. I think we might have to do some more crafty things now that he understands not to eat paint or smear it all over the place! Guess I'll have to use Pinterest to get some ideas for that too!

Happy Easter: Baby O meets the Easter Bunny!

Yeah it was crazy-expensive and it's not like he's actually going to remember that it happened, but what did you expect? I'm ridiculous.

Happy Easter!

Love,

Kathleen, Husband, and Baby O

The Story of Baby O's Life

Husband and I welcomed Baby O into the world at 6:22 a.m. on January 18, 2012.  He's an absolute doll (even when he's refusing to go to sleep at 2:30 in the morning) and we couldn't be happier!

Not surprisingly, Baby O made a memorable entrance into the world. Nothing about my getting pregnant or being pregnant had been easy, so I was expecting some sort of excitement at the hospital. I was not disappointed.

Because the doctors were convinced that Baby O was big and because of my gestational diabetes diagnosis, we scheduled an induction for January 17, 2012. When we woke up that morning, there was a dusting of snow on the ground and it was sleeting outside. Lovely. As instructed I called the hospital to ask if we should still arrive at 7:00 a.m. They told us to come in at 7:30 a.m. instead because they were anticipating some of the morning shift to have commuting issues.

We arrived at the hospital and got checked in by 8:00 a.m. Then I had a few different examinations by the nurse and resident, who reported to my doctor how far along I was. We had two options for medications to begin the induction: cervidil and pitocin. I had mixed feelings about which one I preferred: I'd heard that with pitocin, the contractions can come on like a ton of bricks, giving your body no time to prepare for the pain, but the cervidil had to work for twelve hours, which meant we'd have to wait until late Tuesday evening before there was even a possibility of anything happening.

Ultimately my doctor decided to do a round of cervidil, which she administered at 10 a.m.  Then we just sat around all day. I was only allowed to eat clear foods so Husband kept running to the unit refrigerator to get me orange Jell-O, popsicles and ginger ale. I had an IV and two fetal monitors on so getting out of bed to even use the bathroom was a total pain. Husband was helpful when I needed to get unplugged and our first nurse Kelly was very nice as well.

At about lunchtime, the contractions started. Initially they were a good ten minutes apart and were very light. Husband would watch the monitor and ask, "Are you having one?" and I'd have to think a minute before a twinge of pain would hit me. 

Around the same time, the nurses changed shifts, which I was not happy about. The new nurse Kathy was just annoying from the beginning: she came in and asked why I wasn't walking around the unit. I told her that no one had connected me to the portable unit so if I left the room, they wouldn't be able to monitor the baby's heartrate. So then she went on about how I simply had to walk around and then said something about the doctor doing a second round of cervidil which would tack another twelve hours minimum onto the delivery. I was like, "Oh heck no!" I told Husband that I was not a fan of this new nurse and that I thought she was only working until 7:30 p.m. I hoped that was true and that I hadn't just made it up and thankfully it turned out I was right!
After promising me more orange Jell-O like four times (only green was left in the refrigerator) and taking nearly an hour to get batteries for the portable unit, Kathy finally unhooked all my wires and Husband and I ventured into the hallway to take a walk.  Two minutes later a nurse came chasing after us because we had ventured out of the range of the portable fetal monitor. So basically all Kathy's fussing was that she wanted me to be walking a twenty foot length of hallway.

Though as annoyed as I am to admit it, when the contractions were just "uncomfortable", the walking did help take my mind off them.
By the time the new nurse Audra arrived, the contractions were getting more intense and really close together: less than three minutes. It felt better to move around or to lie on my side so I spent most of my time over the next few hours trying to manage the pain. Audra helped me breathe through the contractions which also helped a lot. She then said something that made me like her even more than I already did: that at 10 p.m. I could probably take a shower and have some dinner!

The doctor came in just after 10 p.m. and I was slightly more dialated. It didn't sound like much to me but the doctor seemed pleased and was ready to start the pitocin. I asked about eating and she said that I could have dinner so Husband went downstairs to pick me up a sandwich.

While he was gone, Audra started setting up the supplies for delivery. She explained that she prefers to have everything ready to go in case things start happening fast. After spreading a blue sheet on a steel table, she started arranging all the tools and surgical supplies for the doctor. It was at this moment that Husband walked back into the room with my sandwich.

Husband: Whoa, it just got real in here!

Apparently up until that point, Husband had felt like we were just hanging out in some type of weird hotel room, but seeing all the tools laid out on the table made him realize that eventually there would be a baby arriving!

At 11 p.m. we finally started the pitocin. I was still really nervous about it because while the cervidil contractions weren't terribly painful, they were already really close together. My concern was that if the piticin amped up the intensity of the contractions, I'd basically be having constant painful contractions until the little guy arrived.  We started on the lowest dose and Audra said she'd increase it from there depending on how I was doing.

Throughout this whole process, I'd been really unsure about getting an epidural. I have a decently high tolerance for pain and because I tend to get anxious, the idea of not being able to feel my lower body really freaked me out. Earlier in the day the anesthesiologist came in to do a consult with me and she had assured me that my legs wouldn't be totally numb. I'd also spoken with a good friend who had just been induced at the same hospital last year. She said that getting the epidural actually helped her relax and she ended up dialating really quickly afterwards (apparently fighting the contraction pain was taking so much energy that her body forgot to actually get ready for labor!)  Armed with all this information, I figured I'd just play the whole thing by ear and see how I felt.

Almost immediately after we started the pitocin, the contractions began to get much more intense and as the night went on, they got progressively closer together too (remember they were already three minutes apart with the cervidil!). Husband tried to get some sleep and I did too, but by 1 a.m., I was in too much pain to just breathe through the contractions. Audra suggested we get in the shower. While the warm water definitely felt nice, I felt really unstable on the chair she set up (just a rolling stool with some pillows around it). I was afraid that I was going to fall when the contractions really got going so I told her I wanted to get out. At this point, they were coming about a minute or so apart and lasting nearly a minute. In the span of my getting out of bed and going to the bathroom, I was having four or five contractions.

At 2:15 a.m., I said to Audra, "I think I'm dying." She smiled and laughed a bit (after having been her only patient for nearly seven hours at that point, she had learned that I tend to be prone to hyperbole). I looked her in the eye and said, "I'm not kidding." I was really miserable at that point as evidenced by the fact that I promptly threw up all my dinner. Awesome.

Me: How do you stand being a nurse? I'm disgusted with myself right now and I'm me!

She gave me some sort of explanation about how everyone is good at different things that made me feel better (partially because I was too miserable to care about how gross I was!). I asked if it made sense to check how dialated I was and she asked, "Well if we do that and you are farther along, what's the plan?"

Without even thinking, I responded, "Epidural."

She checked me out and I was up to four centimeters so she immediately put out a page for the anesthesiologist.  He arrived almost too quickly because I hadn't gotten up my strength to make one last trip to the bathroom! Luckily he was willing to wait and soon I was perched on the edge of the bed. At that point, Audra had turned off the pitocin, which has a really short half life so it didn't take long to get out of my system.  Unfortunately the half life was just long enough to last as I got the epidural and so every minute or so the anesthesiologist was kind enough to stop working and let me deal with the contraction. Somehow I managed to breathe through the one portion where he couldn't stop and I had to stay perfectly still and I got to lie down in bed as my lower body gradually got more numb.

I think I ended up with the perfect epidural. I could still feel my legs, but they just felt heavy and any pain just felt like pressure. A few times Audra asked me to reposition my legs and with her help, I was able to do so. I definitely didn't feel like my legs were gone forever, which had been my biggest fear. At one point I was feeling pain on my left side so the anesthesiologist topped me off with a second dose and the pain was gone after ten minutes or so.

The anesthesiologist left my room at about 3:15 a.m. and I tried to get some sleep. Then about an hour later, it felt like a water balloon popped between my legs. I called Audra and told her I thought my water had broken. She came in and confirmed that it had.

At that point I was worried that I wouldn't deliver by 7am. Both my doctor and nurse were scheduled to change shifts at 7am and I really didn't want to have to deal with two new people halfway through the actual giving birth process. Audra told me that if I was really close, she didn't intend to just walk out so I was glad to know that at least I'd have one familiar face in the room with me!

She left me alone to try to get some more sleep. Then at about 5:15am I started feeling some pressure. I speculated that it was labor-related because it seemed to occur every few minutes which lined up with when the contractions were happening. Audra came in again to check me and confirmed that I was fully dialated and the pressure was Baby O's head ready to come out!

It turned out to be really smart of Audra to prepare the delivery supplies in advance because everything happened crazy fast at that point! My doctor poked her head in (no doubt thinking that she was going to get to finish up her 24 hour shift without delivering one last baby!) and Audra told her that I was fully dialated.

Doctor: What? Really?

They told me that I'd start to push at about 6am and left the room to make last minute preparations. I woke up Husband and told him that we were getting ready to have a baby and he woke up really fast! I'd been worried about how Husband would deal with labor since he tends to get a little woozy when we're going through medical procedures. Audra suggested that he go get some cranberry juice to increase his sugar so he left the room.

Once he was gone, Audra suggested that I start pushing. I asked when the doctor would come in and she said that once he was crowning, she'd call in the doctor. Until then it would just be me, her and Husband. So we went ahead and pushed once and as Husband was coming back into the room, Audra grabbed the intercom and paged the doctor! He was crowning already!

Our doctor came in and I pushed two more times. Then I heard one of the nurses say, "Triple nuchal," and the doctor told me to stop pushing for a second. It seems that in all the excitement, our little guy had gotten his umbilical cord wrapped around his neck three times! Our doctor was totally calm and just snipped the cord off and Baby O was fine. Then I pushed another time and he was out!

Ultimately I ended up pushing for about 20 minutes (even less if you consider that the 20 minutes included the few minutes that the doctor was dealing with the umbilical cord situation). The nurses immediately put him onto my chest and my first thought was, "This is a tiny baby! There is no way he's 8 pounds!"

They weighed him and I was right: he was 6 pounds, 14 ounces and 20 inches long. Everyone was shocked and still can't figure out how they misestimated his size so much.

Luckily we'd received quite a few Newborn size clothes and diapers at my shower and from a girlfriend whose son was born in August. I was so convicned that we'd be bringing an enormous baby home that I only bought clothing 3 Months and bigger! As it turns out, the Newborn outfit that I brought for Baby O to wear home was absolutely swimming on him! Even now with his one month birthday right around the corner, he's still exclusively wearing Newborn sizes!

Thank you so much for all your well wishes and I hope I haven't kept everyone in too much suspense waiting for a birth story! As you can probably imagine, having a new baby is pretty exhausting and as I type this, I know I'm on borrowed time since he's waking up from a short-lived nap! Husband and I couldn't be happier though or more in love.

Happy New Year: Bump Photo & Finished Nursery Pictures!

There wasn't much doubt but now it's absolutely certain that our little guy will be a 2012 baby.  I had jokingly told Husband that he'd agreed to come last night because he was officially full term (37 weeks) and we'd be covered by our 2011 insurance, but the evening turned out to be completely uneventful on the baby front.

The last few months have flown by! A few hours after my last post, we got a freak October snowstorm and lost power for more than a week! We ended up evacuating to my grandmother's house a few hours away where we managed to keep warm, get some work done, and, most importantly, find a generator for next time (thus ensuring that we'll never lose power in our house again!)

I returned home just in time to receive notice that one of my cases was ready to start the appeal process. That meant 40 straight days of frantic reading, researching and brief-writing which took me straight through Thanksgiving and Christmas.

36 Weeks: Christmas Eve

My brief was sent off in the mail on Wednesday of last week and I have to say my motivation to go back to work decreased pretty significantly at that point.  I know this sounds crazy, but I've loved being pregnant even though I've been completely miserable about 80% of the time. My doctor offered to write me a note for bed rest a few weeks ago, but honestly it's not comfortable being at home either so I told her I might as well go into work and be productive. I'm reconsidering that decision right now because at least while sitting at home, I can be in jammies!

The biggest issue has been a nagging pain in my upper right abdomen. It started off as sporadic and only after I did a lot of moving or standing. Then it progressed to every afternoon, regardless of my activity level. And now it's pretty much constant, with a pain that radiates around to my back included for good measure. It's next to impossible to get comfortable anywhere and most nights I end up in tears because I can't relax to get to sleep.  Husband has been so helpful around the house though: cooking, cleaning, and last night he rubbed my back until I fell asleep. I'm so lucky to have him around to take care of me!

Speaking of Husband, his hard work in the nursery finally paid off a few weeks ago when our furniture arrived! We rearranged it a few times before settling on a floor plan and then Husband got to work installing shelves in the changing nook. I'm so happy with the finished product and now all we need to make the room complete is our little guy!

Crib, Munire Essex Collection (purchased at USA Baby)

Leachco Teether Guard (Amazon)

Best Chairs Storytime Series, Rena (purchased as USA Baby)

Kids Line Jungle 1-2-3 Lamp (Amazon)

iPod dock (Brookstone Outlet)

Table (Christmas Tree Shop)

Blanket handmade by friend

Glow Worm (in crib) (gift from my sister)

Monkey (in crib) (gift from Husband's sister)

Kids Line Jungle 1-2-3 Hamper (Amazon)

Munchkin Arm & Hammer Diaper Pail (Amazon - Christmas gift from Husband)

Closetmaid 3 Shelf Organizer (Target)

Koala bins (Babies R Us)

Little Boutique Night Light - Monkey (Babies R Us)

Changing Pad (Pottery Barn Kids)

Carter's Changing Pad Cover (Babies R Us)

Crane Humidifier (Amazon)

J.J. Cole Diaper & Wipes Caddy (Babies R Us)

Dresser, Munire Essex Collection (purchased at USA Baby)

Hutch, Munire Essex Collection (purchased at USA Baby)

Assorted books from Wishing Well at Baby Shower

Rabbit figurine from when Husband was young

Sherling Sheep Blanket (Costco)

Willow Tree "Home" Figurine (gift from sister)

Kids Line Jungle 1-2-3 Switch Plate Cover (Amazon)

Obviously we haven't used any of these things yet so I have no idea whether they are useful or practical or helpful or anything, but I think the room looks pretty darn snazzy and I have high hopes for most of the items as they were highly recommended by Baby Bargains, an absolutely amazing pregnancy shopping book that I picked up months ago!

Although my due date isn't until January 21, we have an induction scheduled for January 17. Our little guy is already very big (6.7 pounds at the 35 week ultrasound) and I happened to develop gestational diabetes so they don't want me to go beyond my due date. It's very exciting to think that in just a few weeks, our little guy will be here!

Happy New Year everyone! I have a feeling 2012 is going to be awesome!

In My Room: Nursery Progress and a Bump Photo!

Today officially marks the beginning of my third trimester! Yay!

In celebration, I thought I'd share some progress photographs of the work that Husband has done in our nursery.

To be clear, Husband is not a handy person. He'd be the first to admit that. I had my heart set on wainscoting and after checking a few books out of the library and speaking with an associate at our local home repair store, Husband seemed pretty convinced that he could install it himself.

And to my total delight, he did an amazing job!

Here's a shot of what the room looked like beforehand: all bland and wainscoting-less. Terrible!

But after Husband putting in a weekend of work wainscoting and Sister-in-Law coming over the following weekend to assist with painting, look at the lovely after photo!

I'm so pleased with the way it turned out. There are a few bald spots that Husband needs to touch up with paint, but otherwise the room is ready for furniture (which unfortunately is not going to show up until around Thanksgiving, even though we ordered it over Labor Day weekend. Good thing we're major planners and ordered so early!)

Because I couldn't wait to get my decorating on, I asked Husband to install the Roman Shades and valances I had purchased so the room would feel more "homey". Even though window covering-installation has been the bane of our existence in this house, he did a great job and even hung up/fluffed out the valances for me!

Obviously we're going to have to get something to wrap the long cords around, but the window came out exactly how I imagined it! I can't wait for the room to start filling up with more stuff!

And because in my last post, I was complaining about not having a baby bump yet, I thought I'd share a photo (from two weeks ago) because I have seriously "popped". Overnight I went from, "Hm she must have had a big lunch," to "Holy moly, she's having a baby!" Clearly I'm very pleased because now I can eat a big lunch and people don't think I'm a piggy, they are well aware that I'm eating for two! Sadly, I wasn't feeling my greatest when this photo was taken, I'd been hunched over all evening in an uncomfortable chair and was experiencing wicked round ligament pain! Ouchers!

And if anyone is interested, the leggings are from Old Navy (available here) and the tunic is from JCPenney (available in stores only) (their respective maternity collections).

I'll try to post again with more nursery updates and bump photos, but I have to be honest, this pregnancy business is wearing me out. I go to work, get home and then almost immediately get into bed! I guess I should enjoy my sleep now before this little guy arrives in January!

Speaking of January, it's snowing outside right now so stay warm everyone!

Happy Saturday! And Happy Third Trimester to me!!!!

These Are the Days of Our Lives: An Announcement

I'm a little late to the table regarding the "scandal" that's recently been a hot topic in the world of Anthropologie-blogging. Click here for JG's ridiculously thorough summary of said scandal.

I've decided to refrain from commenting on the actual goings-on because (1) it's a week later and there's no need to beat a dead horse and (2) I don't actually consider myself an "Anthro-blogger" more of a "talks about all sorts of random ass stuff which frequently includes Anthropologie blogger" so I don't know that my opinion would be appropriate. 

However, the whole incident has led to a fair amount of self-reflection on my part which I do feel the need to address.

When I started my blog back in January 2010, I was running like a mad woman and in need of new (and smaller) clothes. I was restocking my closet and it sounded like a lot of fun to bring all you lovely readers along for the ride. I also thought writing a blog would be a fun way to bring some attention to some of my more random interests.

That anyone started reading my blog continues to shock me and I'm grateful for every single one of you.

However, in the last 21 months, my priorities have drastically changed. Many of you followed my struggles with infertility this past year and again I saw blogging as an opportunity to get some information out there. I don't want to be ashamed or embarrassed to talk about IVF (in vitro fertilization) and putting my journey out there for the world to read helped give me confidence to speak about it in real life.

I don't shop for clothing as much as I used to and reading through many of the comments over at GOMI made me realize why: there are other things much more important to me. That dress I'm so in love with today will be back in another colorway next month or it will go on sale. Or it won't and I'll never own it and shockingly the world will continue to exist.

That isn't to say, however, that I have stopped shopping. In fact, Husband and I made a rather large purchase over Labor Day weekend.

That's right, readers, I'm pregnant. Husband and I are expecting a little baby boy in January and predictably we are both over the moon excited. I've been putting off making an official blogging announcement in the hopes that I'd soon have a cute little baby bump to show off, but unfortunately I'm so tall, even at 22 weeks, I've still got nothing!

That said, I'm going to try to keep up the blog to the extent that I'm able, but from a decidedly different viewpoint. In Princess of Taylor-world, maternity pants are "in" and Pilcro cords are "out". As soon as my bump is a little more noticeable, I'm looking forward to running posts reviewing maternity clothes and even giving advice about combining your non-maternity closet with your maternity closet.

For anyone wondering, my pregnancy is progressing beautifully. The doctors have said on more than one occasion that things look "perfect" and I'm beyond thrilled every time I hear that. Husband and I have been on this journey for such a long time, to hear that we can finally relax and just enjoy preparing for this little guy brings us such happiness!

I have been experiencing some wicked pregnancy symptoms, most notably heartburn and exhaustion. But thanks to my Leachco Pregnancy Pillow and twice-a-week yoga classes, I'm finally starting to feel a bit better. I've also been very excited in the past few weeks to feel our little guy moving and as I type this he's happily kicking away.

I want to thank each and every one of you that's commented or emailed as I've chronicled our journey. And those of you that sent us positive thoughts and well wishes as well.

It is when someone opens their life to the point of sharing happy news like this that it becomes clear that, like in any relationship which has ups and downs, we truly are a community. And one that I'm very happy to be a part of.

Burning Down the House

I can't remember if I've used this post title before, but even if I have, I don't care. It's too perfect to not use right now so forgive me if it happens to be recycled.

On Saturday night, Husband turned on the stupid whole house fan just as I was stepping into the shower.

The whole house fan is a huge point of contention between Husband and I. I hate it. He loves it and is convinced that when it's 3000 degrees outside, all he has to do is open the windows and turn on the whole house fan and suddenly the house temperature becomes bearable.

Wrong.

So in any event, he wisely decided to turn on the fan when I was in the shower and couldn't complain about it.

Unfortunately, this also meant that the fan went into its whole house sucking glory right as the furnace was cranking up to give me some hot water.

The result: the pilot light burned out.

Husband didn't realize that the pilot light had burned out until I walked into the living room twenty minutes later and asked what the unusual smell was. After initially claiming that it was coming from outside, Husband did some investigation and realized that without the pilot light functioning, gas was just flooding into the house.

We immediately panicked, which turned out to be appropriate when a few minutes later the carbon monoxide detector went off. At that point, Husband practically shoved me and our Boston Terrier Abbie into the car and told me to pull out of the garage and into the street. Ten minutes later, he came skittering out of the house, holding Izzy, who had snuck under our bed (I can only imagine this involved continued Festivus-style Feats of Strength because our bed is freakin' heavy!).

We sat in the car for a bit, waiting for Husband's beloved whole house fan to suck the carbon monoxide out of the house. Then Husband decided that he didn't trust our silly little detector so he called the fire department.

Which was awesome. They showed up with a full fire truck and three other vehicles. Our neighbors were freaking out, coming outside to ask what was going on.

The good news is that the carbon monoxide was gone. The bad news was that the firemen couldn't get the pilot light started again.

Our hot water heater is more than forty years old so we knew going into buying the house that we'd need to replace it eventually. I'm just glad that (1) the heating company I like had an appointment to install the new one this afternoon and (2) this didn't happen in January because even with 80+ degree temperatures, a totally cold shower is pretty ridiculously miserable. This morning Husband heated up water for us to bathe "Little House on the Prairie"-style. It was pretty awful.

The hot water heater is just one of a few things that have been breaking down recently (our cars seem to be tag-teaming being in the shop: we pick up one and the other has an issue), which partially explains my absence here. I've been spending all my free time shopping online for new cars and hot water heaters! Arg!

Such is the downside of home-ownership, I guess!

Happy Tuesday!

Something to Talk About: Infertility and the Media

The other night Husband banished me to the bedroom while he watched 60 Minutes on DVR. As I flipped through the channels, I stumbled upon the premiere of Pregnant in Heels.

This show is, in a word, ridiculous. Wealthy, connected, and pregnant New York City couples hire a woman named Rosie Pope who dubs herself a "maternity concierge". She helps them decorate nurseries, choose names, and basically anything else they need to prepare them for the birth of their child. In the first episode, a couple insisted upon hiring a group of experts, empaneling a focus group, and throwing a dinner party for friends...all to choose a name for their son, who they claimed would most certainly be on the Presidential ballot in 2056. In the end, the couple ignored everyone's advice and settled on a name that no one liked...which they totally could have done for free.

I was ready to start flipping again when a particular scene caught my attention. Rosie Pope, the maternity concierge herself, holding a Follistim pen.

A Follistim pen, like I have in my refrigerator right now!

At first I thought perhaps she was branching out and helping women who were not yet pregnant, then her husband appeared on the screen and it occurred to me that in a tremendous bout of irony the maternity concierge was battling infertility.

Lately it seems like infertility is everywhere. And I don't think that's because I'm going through it.

Many years ago, my mother's doctor suggested that she have a mammogram. Nothing was wrong, but my mom had hit an age where it was a good idea to do one. So she agreed and while she awaited the results, she traveled to the beach to visit her brother's family. While there, she called me in a panic:

Mom: There is breast cancer awareness stuff everywhere here!

Me: What do you mean?

Mom: Everyone's wearing pink...and there was a parade this morning. I think it's the universe trying to tell me something.

Or it was October, which is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

Say what you will about television shows like Jon & Kate Plus Eight and other families with high order multiples, but I really do think they are at least partially responsible to bringing the subject of infertility to the forefront. People love twins, triplets, quadruplets. The more babies, the better. And beyond triplets (which occur in only the rarest of cases), these high order multiples do not happen naturally.

Soon, I was noticing that other reality shows were dealing with infertility issues. Giuliana & Bill suffered a miscarriage followed by a failed IVF cycle right around the time Husband and I did. And the Little Couple hasn't even been able to complete a cycle of IVF due to complications arising from Jen's small frame.

As silly as it sounds, but I feel a bit of a kinship with women like Giuliana and Jen: Giuliana is a successful television personality and Jen is a doctor. Both set goals for themselves in life and then achieved them...until now. Suddenly there's this huge thing that seems so easy for every other woman and yet it turns out we're woefully inadequate in that department and there's nothing we can do to change it. Seeing other women experience that out-of-control feeling doesn't necessarily make me feel any better, but at least I know I'm not alone.

Here's the thing though: it's one thing to discuss IVF when cameras happen to be following you around and documenting every detail of your life. It's another to just come out and start talking about it. Not because there are cameras. Not because anyone is going to find out anyway. But just because it's something that happens to women and to couples that isn't shameful. It's not something we need to hide in the corner and be embarrassed about.

Recently it seems many celebrities have begun discussing their experiences with infertility and IVF. Elizabeth Rohm, best known from Law and Order, found out at age 34 that she couldn't conceive naturally and underwent IVF. And Elizabeth Banks, currently appearing on 30 Rock, and her husband had a baby via gestational surrogate.

Perhaps it is just that I've become super-sensitive to matters of infertility. As I searched for the two stories linked above, I came across several sites listing dozens of well-known celebrities who have experienced infertility. I still can't help but think that many of those celebrities "came out" about their struggles in response to an accusation by the media. A celebrity has twins and the first assumption is that there must be a non-genetic reason for it. That turns the revelation into more of a, "Yes, fine, we did IVF. Are you happy?" than a open and mature dialogue about the fact that there are couples out there who simply cannot conceive naturally, but luckily science has stepped in to allow many to achieve what otherwise would be impossible.

When Husband and I were undergoing IUI, we didn't tell anyone save our immediate family. When we had our first miscarriage, we didn't even tell them until months later. That whole period was awful: I felt like I was lying to everyone about everything. Our response to IVF has been totally different: we've been completely open about it because we're not doing anything wrong. Why should Husband lie to his high school friend about why I might not be attending his wedding in June? The truth is that if I have doctor's appointments three times a week, I won't be able to travel.

Does that mean I'm not happy for him to be getting married? Of course not.

Does it mean that I wouldn't love to be there? Sure, granted the wedding is in Nebraska over my 30th birthday weekend, but Husband is definitely going and I'm never one to turn down a great party!

Being truthful is just easier and as expected, Husband's friend understood and wished us luck.

Part of the problem, I think probably the biggest problem, is that people don't know how to respond to someone who is talking about infertility. It's uncomfortable to hear and not something that can be solved with some reassuring words. But sometimes, most of the time, the person dealing with infertility isn't looking for answers.

She's just looking for support. For a friend. For someone to be there for her and distract her with shopping or lunch or a day away from her HCG count or estrogen levels.

The one thing I've learned as Husband and I have navigated the last year is what amazing friends we have. Friends who call Husband to talk because they can tell we're having a bad day. Or friends who show up with cheesecake and movies to entertain me while I'm stuck in bed rest. They don't solve our problems. They don't even try. But they are there for us more than we ever realized friends could be.

Of course there's a difference between telling close family and friends what's going on and blabbing about it to the media (or on a blog!), but in order to get infertility out there as a non-taboo subject, people have got to talk about it. And become comfortable with it.

I'm glad to see that there are finally some younger celebrities and people in the public eye addressing this issue. Hopefully someday infertility won't be thrown around as an accusation and will just be another part of life.

In the meantime, Husband and I are continuing our quest to conceive and will be beginning a second cycle of IVF tonight. Thank you to everyone out there for all your support. I may not "know" you, but reading your comments and stories also makes me realize that we're not alone and I commend any of you willing to share your story on this blog!

Happy Friday!

A Change is Gonna Come: A Brief Explanation of My Recent Absence

I've made a big decision that I'm really excited about and wanted to share with you all.

Effective Monday April 4, 2011, I'll be starting a new job. It's a job within my same organization and deals with the same subject matter, but the work itself is completely different.

After all the emotional and physical ups and downs of the last few weeks, I came to the realization that I simply cannot have a job where so much happens on an emergency basis. New issues are always coming up and the results is chasing a moving target. It's stressful enough as it is (as evidenced by the fact that all my co-workers have a pair of dress pants and jacket in their offices. There's always the possibility that any day, no matter how benign it may begin, could turn into a full day in the courtroom at any moment.), but add to it a personal life that's going through it's own series of issues and it becomes unbearable.

My boss is actually the one who made the suggestion about a transfer. The next day I asked her to ask our Big Boss about my options and now less than two weeks later, it's all set up!

The transfer is temporary and for four months. At the end of the four months, I can either apply for a permanent position in the same office or I can return to my current job. I like the flexibility of not being stuck somewhere, when in all honesty, I'm not even sure if this transfer is going to reduce my stress level. If it doesn't work out, I'll just come back.

The devil you know is always better than the devil you don't know, right?

So the last few days I've spent organizing my cases and preparing to turn them over to other attorneys. It's taking a while because I have a lot of cases. Hopefully I'll be finished by the end of the week and I can start fresh at a brand new position on Monday morning!

I have to say that even the knowledge that I only have 3+ days left in this position is already lifting my spirits!

Happy Tuesday!